I think I created the ultimate

And some fun stuff because life doesn’t really suck-  The vocabulary we have to describe it does.

 

Halloween – tres drole…

November- I love you.

Candle party- I spent alot of money. I think the scents are tainted with some sort of perk or MSG chem.

Post punk shows- I am never drinking again.

Penelope- I have found you.

The ultimate purse- you remain at large.

Twilight- Yes, I love Bella. So great.

The Gap- F your 50 dollar sweaters. I found a cashmere sweater for 14 bucks on your sale shelf.

Lancome- Why is Kate Winslet your new ad girl?

Python- very scary in person, very cute as flats.

Forever XXI- Why not F 21, the forever crowded mini store on a busy Toronto corner? Too long of a name? pssh!

Mexico- O.M.G

Quotes I have made note of…

“That’s very Coldplay.”

“I’m drinking wine like a good girl and here you are drinking Stella.”

“The march of the ladybugs has started.”

 

But honestly, Iced Snowberries? What were they thinking!?!

N

Forget Me So I Can Remember

Greens and lovely red roses.

A week until my getaway and I am getting the graveyard chills.

It has been ten years since my last flight. Aviation runs in the blood so I have never been weary about boarding a airplane. There is another side to it, however. Deep in my mind I have always associated airplanes with freedom and invincibility (like most others, perhaps).

Many a Sunday night was spent alongside Airport rd watching airplanes depart and arrive with my father when I was younger.

Now it seems the only sky gazing I do is while intransit to point A, point B or point C.

And it gets me every time. All it takes is one lone airplane in the sky to make my soul feel ever so low. Some where, at some point I lost touch. I forgot what it was like to be up. To be out of the way. To be on the way, destination known.

Life has been a puzzle of sorts, with too much time in holding pattern or making the blueprints presentable to others. No time spent up high, only rocks to hide under.

This coming Sunday- I will depart from society-zero and cross the Atlantic Ocean…

To arrive in society point five where inspiration still lingers in the air, and  the fig trees allow refuge for your mind and your soul, where coming home means something and the  future has passed; the past is the present, and comfortably so.

Lost luggage, forgotten items, exaggerated time frames and bi-lingual flight attendants asking if you would like TEA (cha) or COFFEE (cafe)?

 

N soho

 

24 hour party people (eating veggie dishes).

I turn 24 today.

Anyone down for stiff double vodkas and lovely face time?

*short pause to collect my thoughts*

I am SO wearing a serious black dress tonight.

And my Harajuku heels, like duh.

Oh, is it just me or does Lady Gaga wear Nina Ricci? Just a random thought.

N

(It’s my birthday, I am officially allowed to be self indulgent and superficial and pretentious and egocentric and everything I am not on a normal day. There, I said it.)

Now, really. N

Dear Lily Allen, Shut Your Mouth

Lily Allen’s music. Honestly, I am a fan of it.

What I am not a fan of is her ranting (non lyrical).

Allen blogged recently that free music downloads are a good marketing strategy for successful artists, such as Radiohead and Pink Floyd, but not for indie artists fighting to leave their fingerprints on the music industry and the monster it is today.

Well, self proclaimed close friend of Karl Lagerfeld, daughter of successful parents with careers in the film industry- SHUT IT. You are not exactly an “indie artist” and your fame stretches further than England. “The Fear” is STILL in rotation. You get invites to hip events, sponsored by major companies, the paparazzi still take your picture and, obviously, people still take note of the silly things you say.

Allowing your fans to download your album for free off of your official website would not hurt your bank account but rather make your music more accessible to the world. And that is what every artist wants, is it not? For the world to hear what they have to bring to the table? The income follows accordingly.

Also, the use of the aforementioned bands as examples is incredible because to reach the level of success Radiohead and Pink Floyd are at involves great talent, great perseverance and great music.

You’re just a great whiner.

To all a good night.

N

Collingwood likes company

I…not so much.

Labour day weekend I found myself in Collingwood with my S.O and co.

I demolished two bottles of wine, a six pack of Stella,ate ice cream and slept quite uncomfortably both nights. HOWEVER, it was a rad time.

Saturday I found myself asleep in the middle of a park, on a beach blanket. And so “The White Building LTD” screenplay rough draft came to be.

By Sunday, I was back in Btown falling back into routine and awaiting a new week of the usual dealings.

Labour day weekend was a while ago.

Today was mostly spent in Kensington Market at a small Portuguese restaurant which has been open since I was only a thought, a possibility, in my parents minds. After several dishes of the best seafood in the country, our tab frightened me but a cinnamon latte brought my nerves back to where they first lay.

So worth it.

The drive was great, the weather was comfortable and  the K.M atmosphere- unavoidable.  I thought my red plaid flannel shirt would be an attention grabber- but I was a walking wallflower amongst the stranger K.M folk.

(including a man wearing a red tie- sans shirt.)

Oh, Toronto. I was doing 140 the whole way home.

Only to paint my nails a dark,deep purple and type out another entry.

sigh.

 

“hey, ever played Guesstures?”

“bra strap?! Girdle?! Soutien?”

 

Muah!

N

champagne venting

but my heart still hurts.

I had a great night last night. After attending a baptism early Sunday afternoon, I dropped by my ex roommate’s new place for some drinks and good conversation. We drank a bottle of champagne and a bottle of wine.

Our conversation covered everything from personal goals, family history,school, money worries and our past jobs. It goes without saying that we discussed our relationships pretty thoroughly. After all, everything is connected to our relationships. We have both been involved for over three years.

While her relationship is slightly rocky at times…hard times, of course…my relationship started out on the rocks…and many double vodkas on the rocks…and has managed to smooth itself out.

We always seem to meet in the middle. And this is something I had missed. I know that when we are in each others company, we can talk for hours without getting upset with each  other. We can voice previously hidden concerns and bounce ideas off each other.

When we lived together, both of us were undergoing major construction. And what started out as the perfect prescription quickly caused a bit of suffocation. I required space and companionship and she was glad to provide it. God bless her for being a step ahead of me most of the time.

And god bless our homemade chicken wraps.

Onto the grim.

I  believe in reincarnation. I also believe that people should make the most out of life. Lately, the fact that the three other people I live with are constantly angry and playing silent treatment games with each other (I know, childish, right?) has been driving me a bit mad. We only have one life. Why spend it angry? Why spend it ignoring the people you share a roof with,especially?

I will never understand the people I live with. My feelings on their behaviour and my opinion on their personalities has no weight. It’s all what I  feel and think, anyways. But from 23 years of observation I can’t stand being part of this “family” and this “home”.

The word Home means different things to different people.

To me, Home is not where the heart is. Home is not where I rather lay my head down to sleep. Home is not where I laugh and sit at the table for dinner with the most important people in my life.

Home, for a while now, has been the place I rarely sleep. Home is where I am quiet. I will read, nap, make small meals for myself, etc. I do laugh while I am home. My dogs and their cute ways always leave me chuckling to myself. And my kittens definitely bring out small talk as  they sit and watch me go about my routines. I have not sat down for dinner with the people who I share a Home with in over 6 years.

I do live with the most important people in my life, but you would never know it. Because they rather not speak to me or one another. The have busy scheduales that demand too much of them. They do not see the need for “family dinners” even during Easter or Christmas.

Considering I come from a traditional Portuguese Roman Catholic family everything I have admited above seems outrageous. Believe it, world. At least in this case, the biproduct isn’t all that bad.

though my heart still hurts.

N

The calm after the storm.

With mornings free, I have found myself stumbling around town. Productive stumbling. I have allowed myself to be fully immersed in Btowns parks, little shops and cafes. And I have taken time out of each day to catch up my reading.

I have a list of 5 or so books I intend on reading by October. Ridiculous, I know, but I am commited. I am on book 2 as it stands right now.

With my newly freed time  I have arranged for luncheons and coffee dates with old friends who I had lost somewhere during my 8 months of college.

When I was in school all I was focused on was what assignment was due next, whatever an asshole teacher said during class,what time my bus came and how many hours I would work that week. It all equaled nothing afterward.

The people around me are working on their own paths to self discovery… this month, I will be simply “hanging out”.

In September, I plan to travel to Portugal and Vancouver,BC… work on my book and photography.

For now, I’m shameless. At least that’s what my blush hue is called.

h+k

N

Tuesday morning came in with a breeze

I feel obligated to post.It’s been a real long while.

 

At the same time, I don’t remember anything specific that has happened since my last post- except…

August 5th was the second anniversary of my relationship with Mr Anonymous aka the greatest guy in the world. We went to dinner and drank champagne. Yep, partying like the old people we are.

I checked out 500 days of Summer. Very cute movie, and all from a boys perspective.

 

I awoke this morning at 4:44am with a nosebleed.  What on earth does that mean?!

 

Peace. Love. Organic Guava lemonade.

N

!PUBLIC NOTICE!

While Danika may have  H1N1, please know that I am NOT infected with the virus.

oh.my.god.

My “get well soon” card is en route…

Happy Monday, God has a sick sense of humour.

N

Yikes, gadgets! and french braids.

Quick recap: Ottawa- amazing. Nightlife is rad, lots of boho merchants during the day. No scumbags that creep around at night, for the most part I felt safe at 2 am buying juice from the 24 hr  convenience store down the street from t he hotel. Totally a good thing.

Green day show @ the Scotiabank place… Wicked night. Played 3 new songs then went into the oldies. ie SHE. I nearly melted, then decided it best to dance instead. Lots of crowd-band interaction. I bet alot of kid’s lives were changed that night. We’ve got a new generation of musicians!

Returned to Brampton for Ky’s birthday party. Big turn up. Stayed up til 5am, drinking rye and talking about nothing. At one point, we had both of Ky’s poodle creatures in the pool on surf board looking contraptions. Hell of a night. My boyfriend is 25 and I am almost there, as well.

Highlight of the night was definitely the lack of sketchy behaviour. Thank god for that. (I must seem so uptight.)

That night I was giving a parking ticket by Bob Dylan himself. Brad had some interaction with him:

“wtf, are these tickets necessary?”

“Are you trying to make this difficult?”

“Don’t give us tickets, man. We’re drunk, leaving in a cab. Our cars have to stay here!”

“Have a safe trip home, guys!”

Officer Zimmerman, you’re an arse hole. Too bad I wasn’t there.

This weekend was long awaited. It came and as a result of the shock , I have been up until the early hours of the morning drinking, talking about nothing and always with different people. I think I am liking it. My counterparts may not.

No movie night with Danika this weekend. No coffee with Ann, either. Let’s get to that next week.

True Blood, episode 6 on tonight. HBO owns my eyes. I don’t want them to land on any other chanel for the remainder of my life. Oh, Ms Dramatic. I mean every word.

V Fest this September. Is the line up worth buying tickets for both nights? I may just enjoy the time away from home.

Did you know Barrie has a black widow problem?

Maybe the two night thing is not warranted this time.

peace. love.vampires. says my shirt.

but the mosquitos that have masacred my ankles will have to beg for redemption. I am not a donor. I don’t remember signing the paperwork.

God, I am so abstract. Does it show?

Off to buy some lip balm.Nite,nite.

Some say our life is insane. but it isn’t insane on paper.